I've got myself worked into a tizzy.....about Christmas.
As in, I have to get busy and Get. It. Done.
I realize it's Nov. 19. But the panic to get rolling is real and exists in my gut.
I've already been making my lists and am checking things off, almost daily.
Waiting for the next pay check so that all this spending can be spread out appropriately.
I'm getting the less-than-favorite jobs done ahead of time so that I don't leave the worst jobs for last when my Christmas cheer lags.
But, this morning as I sat with my fuzzy housecoat on, sipping coffee, mind foggy with "what can I do next?" I had a thought.
"Why am I so consumed and driven to get this done so fast?"
Straight into my heart came the thought.....
"Because I don't want to miss Christmas."
Dec. 25 comes to me fast, like a rocket ship, and I find myself drifting through the day, exhausted, and distracted.
And I don't want that.
In my hurry to strike things off my to-do list, I don't want to miss out on being there, body, soul and spirit, on Christmas Day. I want to be in the moment when the big day comes.
But I do have to pause and wonder.....
Have I EVER missed Christmas?
Has it ever come and I failed to be impacted by its' beauty?
Have I ever not paused to remember that we celebrate Christmas because of Jesus?
Has the wrapping of the gifts and the cooking of the turkey and the meeting of the family ever taken more out of me than it's given me?
No. Resounding no.
Oh my. No.
I think the "big day" is part of the "big season". A season meant to be for the giving of love and the receiving of The Love.
So I'm going to strive to be less frantic about the to-do list, and more focused on thinking about the ones I want to give to. I'd like to be less annoyed with writing cards, and more grateful that I have friends who might like to hear from me. I'd like to prepare a feast for my table, a feast of loving conversation. I'd like the joyful Christmas music to be reflected in my joyful heart, not in a stress-induced nauseous stomach.
I'm reminded that....
This is Christ the King!
Whom angels guard
And shepherds sing
Joy for Christ is born
The Son of Mary